Summer, summer, summer

Mountain and ValleyOriginally published June 20, 2013

Can we go climb a real mountain today momma? was the first thing my little boy said to me this morning.

No dear.  Mommy has work to do today, maybe you could pretend to climb one?

We never do anything fun.

Don’t I know it!

I swear I used to have more energy in the summer, but this year I am feeling so drained.  I don’t want to plant the damn sunflower circle – it’s too hot.  I just want to sit and read a book.

And I feel bad about it.  It’s my children’s childhood memories I’m messing with here right?

Oh yeh, I remember the summer when mom was always grouchy and dad was stressed out and it was so, so, so boring.  I mean we never even got to climb a real mountain for crap’s sake.

Breathing…..

The key here is to accept the difficult emotions…to not push them away with a margarita even though that sound so much better.

It works like this:

  1. I am feeling like a terrible mother because I don’t want to spend any time with my children right now.
  2. Instead of continuing down the path of: What kind of a mother doesn’t want to spend time with their kids in the summer – gosh you are awful!  Stop…and go back.  Find compassion for this feeling.
  3. It’s okay that I don’t want to spend any time with my children right now.  Many parents feel like this from time to time.  You love your kids, and you know you do.  Breathe.  This feeling is okay.  I am big enough to experience this frustration.  I can handle this.
  4. This feeling is okay.
  5. This feeling is okay.

Continue until the guilt releases its grip on your heart.  It feels like an emotional exhalation when it happens.  Just keep going.  Be your own caring mother.  Imagine your inner pain as a screaming toddler that just needs to be picked up and hugged.

The more accepting you become of your own darkness, the more light comes in.

I can’t explain it, but seriously…finding compassion for yourself strengthens your “finding compassion muscles,” and it becomes easier to find compassion for all the other people in your life – including the damn kids.

I love my damn kids…so much.

Any idea where I can find a real mountain to climb?

Much Love,