Tips for Adding Peace in the Family

Been back at work for over a month now.  Reminding myself of this – it works with difficult co-workers too. This is actually an excerpt from my ebook – Simple Feng Shui for Everyday Peace.  Enjoy! 

Originally published 11/25/09

Peaceful Mommas Santa

To know ourselves, we must know where we have come from.  Our family is our foundation, our strength and our history.  There is much to be learned from looking at how we deal or dealt with our own family.

But – they stress me out!

I hear you.  Me too.  Whether you family was loving or abusive or somewhere in between…they can be hard to deal with at times.

One way to help alleviate the stress is to remember that these people driving you crazy were little at one time.  Imagine them as innocent, small children…and love them that way.  See them as they are now, but love them as little children.  This helps shift your perspective (I just keep coming back to this) and see how life is connected.  It is a lovely way to love difficult people.

Next, imagine that you chose your family.  Why would you have done that?  What have you learned from them?  Indeed, there are many spiritual traditions that think we do this before we are born.  They say that we choose our family to teach us something we need to work on in this lifetime.  Whether it is true or not, it is certainly a valuable exercise.

Another cool idea is to begin a journal of family stories and add your own commentary.  If you are extremely creative – this could be a wonderful scrapbook or art book.  If not, a cheap notebook is just fine too.  You will be amazed at the insight into your own life you find by reading these stories.  Additionally, you are creating your own history for future generations.  This is an easy way to add lots of strength to your own foundation.

Finally, create fun traditions for yourself and/or your family.  You could go bowling on Valentines Day or play music during Thanksgiving or eat pecans at New Years.  Create your own history and tradition.  In the United States, many of us suffer from a lack of cultural identity.  Personally, I do not know what my ancestry is and assume it is a mix of many different cultures.  So mix it up and do what you love.  You don’t have to be Greek to eat the food – but maybe you are a bit.  Who knows?  Whether you are single, have lots of kids, all the kids are gone, or something else – you have your own terrific history and foundation.  Create the life and traditions that are wonderful for you.